Did you know that 30-40 million Americans have arachnophobia? And among them is one of the two of us? In this episode, David and Eugene review the somewhat obscure 1990 “thrill-omedy” Arachnophobia. We discuss what turns out to be our very different memories of how this movie showed up in our childhoods, whether this Jeff Daniels, John Goodman film holds up decades later, and what it was like to experience the movie again in real time. As always, thanks for watching!
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Today’s episode was meant to be the second half of our discussion of the book Who Moved My Cheese? But as sometimes (often?) happens on this podcast, David and Eugene veered instead toward a different conversation -- this time about ADD/ADHD and neurodivergence. As always, thank you for listening!
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“My brain has too many tabs open.” - Tanya Goodin
David and Eugene have been on a 90’s kick recently, and are sticking with the trend with a review of the business self-help best seller “Who Moved My Cheese?” by Spencer Johnson. We discuss the fable of the two mice and two “Littlepeople” named Hem and Haw, and how remarkably relevant the story remains today. We also apply the mindset from the book to our own lives. As always, thank you for listening!
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“What would I do if I weren’t afraid?” - Haw
In the second half of our discussion of "Queen of Tears," David and Eugene talk about how the show ends, the richness of the characters in this family drama, how meta the show was, and which characters we identified with the most. David asks Eugene whether he'd ever want to visit Sanssouci Palace, and we discuss the endless tropes in K-drama land. As always, thanks for listening!
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“I'm just a lucky man who married the love of my life.” – Baek Hyun Woo
In David’s ongoing effort to get Eugene hooked on K-dramas, we review the recent Netflix hit “Queen of Tears.” David and Eugene discuss what made this Korean drama so good, the main characters, villains, corporate intrigue, and love as seen in rom coms. As always, thanks for listening!
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“Even if I have to search the world, I’ll find a way to live.” – Hong Hae In
I (David) have always found Formula One to be an intimidating sport. Vaguely European, with weirdly shaped cars racing at break neck speeds around bizarrely shaped tracks, without a guide, it’s hard to know what’s going on. Eugene meanwhile has been an auto racing aficionado since his early childhood and can talk F1 shop for days. In this episode, we walk through the sport of Formula 1 through the lens of beginners, discussing everything from the sport itself to its business model, driver personalities, why its paradoxically an ultra elite sport with such broad, global appeal, and how the Netflix series Drive to Survive has expanded its reach, especially here in America. I ask Eugene how it is that as someone with a generally mellow personality he is so into a sport centered around hyper ambitious, ultra competitive people, and I share how after spending a week learning about the sport I became a fan. As always, thanks for listening!
In this second half of our discussion about the movie Sleepless in Seattle, David and Eugene discuss Anne stalking Sam, poor Walter and Victoria’s fates, and debate over some of the choices made by these characters. We explore some of our own theories about love and romance, how we see this movie so differently now that we are both parents, and wonder what’s in store in the future for Sam and Annie. We love doing these nostalgic movie reviews and hope you enjoy the journey as well. As always, thanks for listening!
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“It was like kismet but not, if you see what I mean.” - Annie
In 1993, Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks starred in the hit romantic comedy Sleepless in Seattle. With its quirky characters, clever writing, and stellar soundtrack, not only did the movie put the city of Seattle on the map, it was a huge box office success, and has since been recognized as one of the great romantic comedies. As it turns out, and to David’s surprise, Sleepless in Seattle was also one of teenage Eugene’s favorite movies. In this episode, David and Eugene stroll down memory lane, and discover a newfound appreciation for the craftsmanship of this film that neither of us recognized as kids. Eugene questions whether Walter was such a bad fit for Annie, while both David and Eugene discuss how little details like the peeling of an apple, dropping a bundle of mail, or sitting on piano keys are still memorable decades later. As always, thanks for watching!
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"I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like... magic.” - Sam Baldwin
As Eugene notes in this episode, it’s not a surprise that David has “authority issues.” In this second half of the discussion of Jocko Willink’s book, “Extreme Ownership,” we talk about the idea of being a true believer, whether Jocko is right when he says being a true believer is necessary to being a good leader, and David gets personal in his view of why his reluctance to “drink the Kool-Aid” would make him a lousy leader of any institution or organization.
In November 1978, American cult leader and mass murderer Jim Jones ordered more than 900 members of his cult to drink a mix of Flavor Aid laced with cyanide and commit “revolutionary suicide.” Since then, the term “drink the Kool-Aid” has come to mean believing in foolish or dangerous ideas based on a misguided faith. As always, thanks for listening!
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“In order to lead, you must believe.” - Jocko Willink
My daughter thinks the phrase “you can’t swing a dead cat in this town” is absolutely ridiculous, and to be fair, she’s not wrong! That said, you can’t swing a dead cat these days without hitting a couple self-help gurus and podcasters who love them. But the self help book, “Extreme Ownership” by Jocko Willink caught my attention a while ago, and to me it genuinely reads different than what you typically see on the shelves. Willink is a former navy seal who emphasizes humility and detachment from ego as much as being "hard core." It’s also one of several books I’ve been meaning to talk about on this podcast. In this episode, David and Eugene discuss the concept of extreme ownership, what it means, its pros and cons, David fanboys about Jocko for a few minutes, and we discuss why the phrase “try harder” might mean something very different and ultimately more important than simply, for example, waking up two hours earlier or doing fifty extra pushups. As always, thanks for listening!
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“There is no one else to blame.” - Jocko Willink
After a long time away, David finally gets a chance to ask Eugene the burning questions he’s been wanting to discuss. Ever a trooper, Eugene is a willing participant in following David down rabbit holes, even when addressing A.I., whether boys have positive role models, why parents should never turn their backs on their children, or how to respond to David’s severe case of Trump derangement syndrome. As always, thanks for listening!
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Just open your window
And follow your memory upstream
To the meadow in the mountain
Where we counted every falling star
- Paul Simon
We’re back! David and Eugene reflect on the past year and look ahead to 2024. Eugene talks about why 2023 was such a challenging year, while David discusses his marathon goals, his desire to finally pick up a camera, and what Deion Sanders and marching band taught him last year. As always, thanks for listening!
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“These kids are ready. We prepare them not just athletically, we prepare them mentally for things and challenges that are going to happen in life as well. So, I like what I see on a daily basis. I really do. Matter of fact, I love these kids. I really do.” - Deion Sanders
“A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men.” – Herman Melville
How has the way we parent changed, for better or worse, since David and Eugene were kids? How do we approach major life choices without anxiety or regret? We discuss these questions and more in the second half of our conversation with our dad, Dr. Jonathan Chang.
We’re taking our yearly break for the rest of the summer and will return in the fall. We hope you have a wonderful summer. We appreciate your hanging out with us and as always, thank you for listening!
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"The choices we make today create the future that we are dreaming of." - Kapil tetarwal
CW: This episode contains conversations about parents who don't accept their child's sexual orientation.
It's helpful to have someone in your life you can ask hard questions. I'm lucky enough to consider both my dad and my brother Eugene among such people. In this episode, our special guest Dr. Jonathan Chang returns to the podcast to share his wisdom and a perspective that comes with age. Why do some public figures seem to go from relatively normal to abruptly crazy? What makes parents turn their backs on a child who they love but who comes out as gay? Critically, I should note that none of these questions are directed at dad personally in any way, nor do I expect he'll have all the answers. But it's precisely because I consider dad a safe person that we can raise sensitive and challenging but what I believe are important questions in an open manner. As always, thanks for listening!
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"Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in." ― Alan Alda
I (David) have always had a hard time answering this question. In part because I'm from a family of immigrants but also because we lived in so many places over my childhood. This is the second half of David and Eugene's episode about home. We discuss our "Alien Space Club," the difficult move to Wilmington, Delaware, and what home means for us. As always, thanks for listening!
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"Home is where one starts from. As we grow older the world becomes stranger, the pattern more complicated ... a lifetime burning in every moment." - TS Eliot
Home is where the story begins. Home is not a place but a feeling. David and Eugene have lived in several homes over time, in different parts of the U.S. In this episode, we discuss the places we lived, from our earliest memories to significant events (like the time Eugene broke his femur), and how these spaces shaped and influenced our childhood. As always, thanks for listening!
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“The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned.” – Maya Angelou
Everyone I know, to a person, says they need more sleep. Yet the modern age is not conducive to getting a full eight hours. After a brief discussion about the modern weight loss "miracle cure" Ozempic, David and Eugene get into the nitty gritty of sleep habits, and some of the psychology and hard choices that keep us from going to bed. As always, thanks for listening!
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“A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book.” — Irish Proverb
You can't pick up your smartphone these days without seeing the latest crazy headlines about artificial intelligence, ChatGPT, and how they will take over the world. David and Eugene wanted to take a different approach on the topic and ask what happens if/when people start forming friendships with AI. David plays devil's advocate and argues that having AI friends might be normal in the future, and that may not be a "bad" thing. It's fair to say Eugene has ... a different opinion. As always, thanks for listening!
Music:
GroovyD - Take Off
Declan DP - Wonderland
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"AI can be our friend." - Bill Gates
The average person lives about 4000 weeks. To author Oliver Burkeman, that sounded absurdly brief. So in response to this “radical finitude,” Burkeman wrote the kind of self-help book that David has been wishing for years. One that doesn’t necessarily provide ten tips and tricks for a more productive morning, but asks some of the deeper, more difficult questions about what we spend our 4000 weeks doing, and what we think makes our time worthwhile. In this episode, David and Eugene discuss some of the key ideas from the book, “Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals,” while Eugene talks about why the book may not necessarily be for him. As always, thanks for listening!
Music:
Markvard - Hold On
Nomyn - Farewell
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"Time is a river which sweeps me along, but I am the river; it is a tiger which destroys me, but I am the tiger; it is a fire which consumes me, but I am the fire." - Jorge Luis Borges
The word “hobby” has connotations of something trivial or inconsequential. (The word’s roots refer to “an activity that doesn’t go anywhere.”) But I’m coming to realize just how important and life sustaining hobbies can be in our lives. In this episode, David and Eugene reflect on their lives over the past year, the function of hobbies in their purpose, and Eugene explains why his catchphrase of 2023 is “the ordered year.” As always, thanks for listening!
Music:
Wanheda - Dawn
tubebackr - Mosaic
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"Today is life — the only life you are sure of. Make the most of today. Get interested in something. Shake yourself awake. Develop a hobby. Let the winds of enthusiasm sweep through you. Live today with GUSTO!” - Dale Carnegie
As it turns out, when you put four middle age men in front of a microphone, they have a lot to say. It’s a good thing none of our wives prefer the “strong silent type” haha! This is the second half of our conversation with Sam Chung and Rob Koh. As always, thanks for listening!
Music:
VDGL: Sheherazade
LiQYWD - Miss You
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